HOPE AND JOY AS WE TRUST

“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you my overflow with the hope by the power of the Holy Spirit” – Romans 15:13

I do believe that God and trust go hand-in-hand, however, perhaps, not as we’ve been taught to see it growing up. Though I wish not to sound or appear or feel like an American, conservative, fundamentalist, fluffy Christian, I’m aware believing anything about who Christ was - who he is - can place me straddling the border between Christ’s truth – the heart of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, self control -and fluffy Christianity; these two are juxtaposed. I’ve come to the conclusion that I can’t truly follow after the heart of God without – even in part – sounding or looking like the very type of Christian I highly regard with distaste.

However, I’ve learned that, we, as people, as those looking for the Spiritual realm within this world - and how we relate - can see what we distaste so immensely and throw it all out with one fell swoop. Without full knowledge of what our behavior proclaims or the impact it will have on our being – heart, soul, mind; we throw it all out because we don’t wish to be like any of the fluffy, fundamentalist, evangelical, hypocritical Christian people who pervade this Christian community*.

In essence, we “throw the baby out with the bathwater.” Yet, what are we risking by taking all of our belief system and tossing it out, abandoning that framework that is deep with in us, taking hold of it, and then ridding ourselves of the very thing that likely makes us who we are?

There seems to be a large risk that comes with this behavior, and honestly I believe I’ve seen it in myself. The tendency is to attempt to run away from that which does not fit any longer into the mold which we’ve had created over the many years of life on this earth. We try to fit the proverbial block into the circular hole, and today it no longer fits! Therefore, there must be something seriously wrong with our line of thinking, our beliefs, faith, God, people, etc.. And from this emerge a time of doubt, anger, frustration, hurt, sadness, guilt, resentment, bitterness, and an overwhelming feeling that perhaps we’ve been lied to.

Unfortunately – and I speak with a bit of authority on this topic – this is a circle with no end. There really doesn’t seem to be any point in which everything reverses back to the “way things were” or an easier time in life when all the pieces seemed to fit together so well. The circle continues to be a part of our journey; day-by-day we address the very things that cause us emotional, mental, and spiritual anxiety.

I believe I may be beginning to see the light at the end of this tunnel. It appears I may be getting closer to approaching faith and God, and how they relate to me in this very disgusting and painful world. I think I’m reaching a new level in my spiritual journey. I think I’m moving toward a new stage of spiritual maturity.

Paul’s quote from the book of Romans reminds us: “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you my overflow with the hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” May he? YES! PLEASE! HE MAY! I believe there is some very mystifying truth in this joy and peace as we trust. What do we trust in? How do we know we have this joy and peace? How does the Holy Spirit show itself? Himself? Herself, as the case may be?

Maybe in previous stages of my faith I would have interpreted Paul’s verse differently than I do today. I may have pictured God filling me with joy and peace – a picture similar to a visit to the gas station, placing the nozzle into the gas tank, and filling the tank to the brim. I would have pictured some sort of spiritual agreement – obviously implied (by me) – that if I trust in a non-visible entity I will be gifted/ awarded hope, possibly from this Holy Spirit. My outlook was likely incorrect, yet my entire Christian life has been filled with a picture of God painted like the one I just mentioned.

Today, though, I interpret this very beautiful, eloquent, honest, and powerful scripture verse through a soft heart and a willing mind- though different than a few years previous. I filter it through my life experience, and it doesn’t seem to fit into my previously well-crafted God-box; it appears my faith has matured as I have grown. Now, I would say that I trust – in the big picture - everything is going to be OK. Whether it looks good or seems good, I know it’s OK. My trust has nothing to do with the words I spout out of my mouth or the ability to convince others (or myself) of this ultimate truth, it is softly, quietly residing deep within me, reminding me: it’s going to be OK. This subsequently is followed with hope. Hope that there is good in this world, even amongst the evil and darkness. I have hope that the smallest acts of good will outweigh, someday, the largest acts of evil (“Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” –Romans 12:21). I have hope that as I trust, as my heart becomes softer towards those who need a friend, a shoulder, a conversation, or a relationship, that the acts of relational love that come along with that will fill me with joy and peace as I see a mysterious, spiritual encounter occur between myself and others.

These relationships are where I see God become real: R-E-L-A-T-I-O-N-S-H-I-P-S. Relationships. Real, authentic, caring, reaching-out-to-people relationships that ARE Gods love in this world.

Amen.

*Many of these people are not inherently bad people. They are often very sweet, kind, caring folks. These statements have nothing to do with their kindness or care for others whatsoever. This is simply a picture of a group of people that act a certain Christian way.